No words came out

Dear Blog,

My how things change in just a day or two. Can we slow down the emotional rollercoaster please? Maybe it's an operator error.

The bf brought up such sticky, yucky stuff last night. Stuff I had been hoping to not deal with for at least a couple of months, but it looks like I don't have a choice but to deal. It was sad and emotional. As he talked, I stared at a spot on the wall. As I fixated on that spot, I was vocally frozen, and nothing came out. I desperately wanted a cigarette, because my stress point was finally hit. I, of course did not have any, because I quit about two weeks ago, and for some divine reason, he didn't have any either.

After listening and taking in all the words being poured on me, I walked away and into the bedroom and found a new spot on the wall the stare at. I fell asleep, and it was on my mind first thing this morning.

After work, instead of going to the gym as intended, I came home and wrote a lengthy response to last night's one sided conversation. I felt that mental health came before physical health tonight.

I am turning 29 years old in a month. TWENTY-FREAKING-NINE. I feel like that sounds so old, but I don't feel it physically. 28 has been one hell of a year, my god. I would say 28 has been the biggest rollercoaster of them all. I foresee 29 being a bit on the wild side as well, but I'm hoping to tame that beast before the last year of my 20's gets too out of control. I'm hoping for a wild, good time, but not in the same way of this year.

At 28 I:
* Quit smoking (hopefully for real this time)
* Joined a gym and actually worked out
* Will be getting a paralegal certificate
* Will have a horrible breakup resembling a divorce
* Started a blog to memorialize all the crazy shit going on in my life
* Moved out of my apartment
* Moved in with strangers
* Moved back in to my old apartment
* Made a decision to move for myself to a place that has SNOW

I suppose now that I've written it down, it doesn't seem like so much. Actually, it seems a little on the short end of exciting things going on in a year. I'm a bit of an adventure junkie, and overcoming challenges and pushing myself to the limits gives me an extra notch on my belt.

Over and out, folks.